Well, I'm Not Dead

Just got home from the hospital late night before last....


Seems my gallbladder has been making stones for some time now, and one of the little bastards decided to block up my bile duct, which then sent my gallbladder into hyperdrive and eventually into spasms, which then spewed the fricking stone into my pancreas, which then got all (and, yes, this is a direct quote from the hospitalist) "pissed off at" me, causing my lipase enzymes to read out at ....

wait for it....

("lipase" is a pancrease enzyme)...

and keep in mind...

"normal" lipase #s are,

for adults,

between 18 and 180....

and as of last Friday

(January 22)

mine were...

are you sitting down???

ta da...

8,348.

It was, apparently, a potentially life-threatening situation as, I was told later, people do actually die of pancreatitis when their numbers are that high. Who knew?

So, I guess going to the ER was the right thing to do.

Even for a hard-headed B* like me.

So, here I am at home again (thank you, God!! soooo good to be home!) on some kickin' A pain meds and waiting for the five holes in my belly to heal up.

Sometimes you just gotta do what you gotta do.

And today, I just gotta rest, take my meds, chill, and say a big, huge, freaking, long overdue "I can never thank you enough" thank you, thank you, thank you to all of the people who have put up with me over years and months... and tell you how much I love you and miss you and I really truly am going to make a better effort to keep in touch and get together.

So, I love you and I miss you and let's get together when I can, again, o.k.???
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SFPs and their behaviors....

I live in a condo.


We have assigned parking.




The person who is assigned my mirror spot is a Selfish Fucking Pig (aka SFP).

Here's the proof.

Ah.  The sad, warped, self-absorbed world of the SFP. 

SOOooooo glad I live in my head, not hers!!
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Snow Days

There's this funny thing that happens in St. Louis every time the weather forecasters predict snow:

The grocery stores get bombarded by shoppers buying milk, bread and eggs. 

I'm not kidding.

Maybe it happens in other parts of the country, too.  But here in St. Louis it's like some kind of weird tradition or something. 

Who knew that French Toast is, apparently, the only food that will safely see you through a blizzard????

So, all day yesterday the forecast was for a huge snowstorm - up to six inches of snow, which is huge for St. Louis.  (Chicago, Milwaukee and upstate New York:  I know you're laughing at this.  Keep it to yourselves.)

And, true to form, the grocery store parking lots were packed last evening as I was leaving work and heading home.  I did not participate in the pre-snow stock-up.  I just wanted to get home!

We did get our storm.

And I did stay home today.  Roads were wicked snow-packed and I chose to be safe rather than sorry.

Now I am left with only one question:

If you are going to be home all day, especially if you have a house full of kids who now have a snow day off from school, isn't a big supply of toilet paper going to be at least as essential as milk, bread and eggs?

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